Life Without Mother

Dear Mom,

I leave in three days for Louisiana and move in five days from now! What? It seems like just yesterday we were moving here and I had my ninth birthday party, the first life celebration since moving to this place we had never heard of called Frisco. Well, the first celebration since we found out there were actual trees and grass here rather than tumbleweeds and dirt. Now I am mere days from starting my life away from home.
It seems like such a leap to go from childhood to adulthood. Like parents just toss their kids out the door and say, “Here’s your new life–hope everything goes okay! Good luck (you’re gonna need it)!” or, rather, the good Christian parents say, “Here’s your opportunity to follow God’s awesome plan for your life–He’s going to do pretty great things with you even if you have no idea yet! We’ll be praying (Lord knows you’re gonna need it)!” Either way there is still this sense of ripping the carpet out from under us. Cutting that last thread tying us to the life of innocent, irresponsible children. When you stop and think about it, it’s insane to think anyone makes it out alive! I mean, we start out at year eighteen, having had only about ten years of conscious thought and only six years or so of opportunities to develop our own opinions of things. It’s such a short time in comparison with our average future of about eighty years.
I’m almost slightly nervous about next week–excited, yes, but also nervous. This is the moment to see if I can do it, if I can rise to adulthood and living without the constant comfort and safety of home. I’ve certainly had it easier than many fellow college freshmen  this past year, only working a job for extra pocket money rather than actual expenses and getting a scholarship without studying just because God has blessed me with a quick mind that retains things easily. The carefreeness of my life has not equipped me well for the difficulty that comes with the higher level thinking in college. I pray that my acknowledgement of that fact now will allow me to overcome the weakness of my circumstance and become the studious, hard worker I can be when I apply myself.
I wish I had your go-getter attitude Mom. Dad says I’m a lot like you in my faith and big heart for others, but sometimes I wish I had your need for things to always be orderly and your never-stop-until-the-job-is-finished mind. Put in a word for me with God please–I need all the extra help I can get! Don’t worry, I’ll be putting in my own words as well!

Your daughter,
Hannah